Prayers Please

Part of the reason for my month long hiatus from the blogging world has been due to a little medical scare I've been dealing with the past few months.  Well I guess it really started back in January.  I've never really had a hard time dieting/losing weight, not that I'm a really skinny person, but I normally can work out, watch what I eat and lose weight pretty easily. I've never necessarily had weight problems and I've normally had a great metabolism.  In fact, Jamie has always been jealous of my metabolism because in the past I could eat whatever and as long as I worked out, I was okay. Last year in the fall, I had no trouble dieting and lost 10 lbs in about 2 months but fell off the wagon around the holidays.  I got back on the diet in January and was really watching my carb/sugar intake to no avail.  Not only that, but I was tired all the time.  I began doing Advocare and lost 17 inches overall and not a single pound.  I was really discouraged and completely baffled.  The inches were great but I couldn't understand why I hadn't lost any weight?  I decided to go to a women's hormone clinic to have blood work done and see what the problem was.  She discovered that I had hypothryroidism and put me on Armour Thyroid, a natural hormone replacement medicine.  She also told me to keep doing what I was doing and the weight should begin to fall off.  Well, it didn't.  And I was still hard core watching what I ate. After talking with several other people that had hypothyroidism, I discovered that EVERYONE diagnosed with this was on a different medicine thank I had been prescribed, Synthroid.  After 3 months on Armour and no noticeable difference, I went back in for a follow up and asked to be swapped over to Synthroid and a recheck on my blood work.  My bloodwork came back normal (meaning the Armour was working) however, I still didn't feel good and I still hadn't lost any weight.  I asked to be changed to Synthroid and reluctantly she did. 

At this point, I decided I should see an Endocronologist.  By then, it was the end of August and I felt like this had been going on for too long to not really have any answers.  I had an appointment with Dr. A, the endo, and he confirmed I had thyroid disease but also discovered a nodule on my thyroid.  Your thyroid is located at the base of your throat and is butterfly shaped around the trachea. Your thyroid produces hormones that keep your metabolism going so with hypothyroidism, you aren't producing enough of those hormones, which causes your metabolism to slow down, resulting in weight gain, fatique, sadness/depression, constipation, joint/muscle pain, increased sensitivity to cold, dry skin, thin brittle hair/nails, infertility and overall weakness.  Once you have thyroid disease, it's a lifelong disease and you will be on meds for the rest of your life.



He expressed some concern because when someone has hypothyroidism, it's common for your thyroid to become bumpy all over (with goiters), however mine just had the one nodule on the right side.  He did mention that it COULD be a tumor/cancer and so we had to take proper precautions to rule that out.  He also told me that based on what he could feel, it seemed rather large so we might have to do surgery to have it removed regardless if it was cancer or not.  He set me up for an ultrasound which confirmed what he was feeling on my thyroid wasn't a goiter but indeed a nodule. The next step was a fine needle biopsy.  This was a procedure that I had done in the hospital, where they deadened the skin then inserted several needles in my throat guided by ultrasound, into the nodule to extract tissue to be tested.  It was nerve-wrecking (they told me don't talk, move, or breathe while the needles were in my throat) and slightly painful.  My neck was sore the rest of the day after the biopsy. 

Two long weeks later, Jamie and I went back in for the results and were told that the biopsy came back suspicious.  WOW. It was like having the wind knocked out of me. Totally not what I was expecting.  The only option is to surgically have the right side of my thyroid removed and slice open the nodule to see if it is cancer.  I was given the option of having surgery at ECM with a general surgeon or being referred to UAB and seeing a Otolaryngologist, basically a specialist that does this type of surgeon all the time (I chose UAB).  Of course, it took a month to get in at UAB so I just had my consult for surgery this past Tuesday.  I really like my surgeon, Dr. Peters.  He came highly recommended by a friend who's husband is also a surgeon at UAB.  He told me that the nodule is so large, 3 mm, that it would need to be removed based on size alone.  Every doctor that I've seen can't believe that I never noticed the nodule before having the doctor find it.  So surgery is set for Friday, January 11th (which coincidentally is the 2 year anniversary of when my dad was diagnosed with his cancer).  They will make about a 2 inch incision in my throat to remove the right side of my thyroid and while I'm on the operating table, they will cut open a frozen section of the nodule to inspect it for cancer. If it is cancer, they will then remove the remaining portion of my thyroid.  If it's not cancer (praying this is the case) then they'll close me back up with half of my thyroid still intact and I'll just take Synthroid the rest of my life and be done with all of this.  It's just a day surgery so I'll be released later that day and will be in pain for about a week or two.  Also there's a good chance it will affect my voice for several weeks but all of that will get back to normal eventually.  Now if it turns out to be cancer, I will have to undergo a radioactive iodine treatment but I won't go in to details until I know that's something we'll have to tackle. 

During all of this, my doctor took me off of Synthroid so I have gradually felt worse and worse since September/October.  His reasoning was that he wanted to take care of the nodule first then address how much medicine I need to be taking.  The past month has been terrible.  At first I just thought I was sad because of all of the that's been thrown my way, however, I realize that it's the lack of the hormone that's causing me to feel this way.  Tired doesn't even describe the way I've felt.  It's like extreme exhaustion all day long, regardless of how much sleep I get the night before.  I've literally been afraid I would fall asleep while driving Noah to school at 8 in the morning.  As terrible as it sounds, thank goodness for Chuggington and Mickey Mouse.  They have entertained Collier while I've laid on the couch the past few weeks.  I've been unexplicably sad at times and just feeling really unmotivated, achy, tired and blah. Plus I've gained a few pounds and we all know how that makes a girl feel.  I finally called Dr. A and all but demanded to be put back on the medicine because I HATE feeling this way.  Thankfully, he put me back on it yesterday and had me come in for more blood work to see what doseage I need for now (it will probably increase once I lose 1/2 of my thyroid from surgery). 

I have moments where I'm so overwhelmed and upset but for the most part, I know that God is in control and I trust that he's going to take care of me in this situation, as He has in everything else.  Life has definitely thrown us some curve balls the past 5 1/2 years, but I also realize that if it wasn't for dealing with Noah's craniosynostosis surgery/developmental problems and my dad's cancer, then there's no way I'd be so calm facing this surgery and subsequent cancer scare.  I just am asking for all of your prayers as we head into this surgery next month.  I'm thankful for an amazingly supportive and loving family and group of friends to help hold us up during this time.  I've been shocked at the outpouring of love and concern from new friends that I've just gotten close with in recent years (and in some cases, recent months).  You expect it from your older friendships but its such a pleasant surprise from the newer ones.  Its heart-warming and I'm so grateful to have all of these friendships, new and old.  Most importantly, I'm grateful for a loving God that is holding my hand every step of the way! 

And lastly, I don't think any of you that read my blog are friends with my grandmother, but if you are, PLEASE DO NOT mention this to her.  She takes the word 'worry', to a WHOLE other level so we are waiting until the week of (more like day before) to tell her about this surgery.  Trust me, its much better for her (and all of us) if we wait in telling her. 

James 1:2-3 Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith produces perserverance.

 

1 Peter 1:6-9 In all this you greatly rejoice, though now for alittle while you may have had to suffer grief in all kinds of trials.  These have come so that the proven genuinesness of your faith - of greater worth than gold, which perishes even though refined by fire - may result in praise, glory and honor when Jesus Christ is revealed.  Though you have not seen him, you love him; and even though you do not see him now, you believe in him and are filled with an inexpressible and glorious joy, for you are receiving the end resulf of your faith, the salvation of your souls.